Please Remember I Love You (When You've Forgotten Your Way)
by fanficloverme96
Summary: ONE-SHOT: "This is to Kurt, for being there." Kurtbastian


**Please Remember I Love You (When You've Forgotten Your Way)**

**Warning: Major Character Death and terminal disease.**

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"This is to Kurt, for always being there."

_("Well hello, there Kurt. Fancy seeing you around here," came that familiar confident smirk that Kurt grew to endure the past few months.)_

"Kurt…he…is like nobody I've ever met. No, seriously, I'm not joking. He's completely different than everyone else."

_("Leave me alone, Sebastian. I don't have time for you." Kurt crossed his arms and looked away. But even in the dim lights, Sebastian could see the way his eyes shone with unshed tears.)_

"When I first saw him, I knew…that I wasn't going to like him."

_("What's wrong, Kurt? You seem a little down. Where's the Gay Cyclops?" Sebastian kept his tone light and casual but his eyes were studying Kurt critically.)_

"Unlike the others, Kurt didn't flinch from my mean words. Instead, he swallowed them and spit out a few meaner words of his own."

_(Kurt did not reply right away. But when he did, Sebastian could hear the break in his voice.)_

"I didn't want to have anything to do with him and I'm confident that he felt the same way.

_(Blaine had cheated on Kurt. Again. And from the way Kurt trembled from his effort in remaining still, it had left Kurt extremely hurt and broken.)_

"But you see, that was kinda impossible. We kept on bumping into each other at random places."

_(Kurt had turned to him, with tears already escaping his eyes and his bottom lip trembled. "I just wanted someone to love me. Is that too much to ask?" he asked in a small voice.)_

"We ended up talking a lot. Well…arguing most of the time, I guess."

_(At some point, the two of them had gotten drunk. Sebastian had offered Kurt a drink as a form of comfort to which the boy had accepted. He did not realize that one drink could easily become six.)_

"He never lets me win in arguments and that got on my nerves. I'm used to having things go my way."

_(He did not know what happened in between but somehow the two of them had ended up at Sebastian's dorm room, kissing and clinging on to each other desperately.)_

"But over time, it was something that I grew to get used to."

_("Oh, fuck, yes…" Kurt moaned when Sebastian continued to thrust harder and faster, his fingers gripping Kurt's hips tightly.)_

"In the end, I sort of missed it."

_(Kurt woke up with a feeling of dread. What had he done? He squeezed his eyes shut and his breathing quickened when he felt Sebastian's arm draped over him.)_

"Somehow…we ended becoming friends. It was…weird. Yet…I kinda liked it. Friends…huh."

_(There were more tears from Kurt, with shaky explanations that no, this should not have happened. He was drunk. It was all a big, stupid mistake.) _

"When Kurt began to have some problems in his life, I was always there, for some reason. It wasn't intentional, but somehow, Kurt always managed to find me."

_(Sebastian had looked at him with serious eyes, and clasped Kurt's hands before kissing him, deep and passionate.)_

"And when it was me who's having problems, Kurt's always there. It was weird…in a good way. I'm not making much sense, am I?"

_("It's not a mistake for me, Kurt. It shouldn't be for you, either.")_

"…"

_(The two of them ended up hanging out after the whole incident, keeping in touch pretty often through phone calls and texts.)_

"I…don't know…what to say, now."

_(And when Kurt cried again over Blaine, Sebastian had held him through it.)_

"I mean, what else can I say?"

_(Somehow, in a way that Kurt thought was never possible, they had fallen in love. But the confession itself was messy, with shouts, screams, accusations and a lot of tears.)_

"What else can I say about Kurt without…"

_(But they made it through, in the end, as if clinging on to each other in the pouring rain while murmuring promises never to leave each other ever again was not enough of an indication.)_

"Without…having the urge to punch something?"

_(It was four years later, Kurt was twenty-two and in his final year at NYADA, and Sebastian was twenty-one, in his third year in law school, when Sebastian had knocked on Kurt's apartment door, surprising the boy with a bended knee and a beautiful silver ring.)_

"I…I can't tell you…No words can possibly explain how much I miss him."

_(The wedding came only eleven months later when Sebastian graduated law school and Kurt became a permanent employee at Vogue. It was simple yet sweet and each of their friends attended the ceremony.)_

"Like…'missing him' doesn't even cover it."

_(Even Blaine, with his new boyfriend of two years. Kurt had forgiven him some time ago, deciding that they're just not meant to be together. He was happy for the two of them, though.)_

"Every time I hear a Broadway song that I knew Kurt recognized, I would imagine him singing it."

_(The Hummel-Smythe household in an apartment in New York was only completed five months later, when the pair had adopted a baby girl as their daughter. Rachel, who was now re-engaged to Finn, suggested the name 'Sophie'. Sophie Hummel-Smythe. Kurt liked the sound of that.)_

"Every time I see a Wicked poster, I see him, dancing around with his witch hat."

_(Sebastian worked as a lawyer while Kurt continued his work at Vogue while involving himself with one of Rachel's Broadway works if he had the time.)_

"Don't even get me started with Defying Gravity."

_(Kurt was Finn's best man at his wedding. Sebastian was Blaine's when Blaine got married a few years later. But of course, Kurt helped with the decorations. )_

"Glee clubs remind me of him, too. You have no idea."

_("I love you, Sebastian," murmured Kurt one night in their bedroom, Kurt was twenty-nine and Sebastian was twenty-eight, stroking Sebastian's hair lazily. Sebastian thought he heard something wrong in Kurt's tone of voice, but he chose to dismiss it.)_

"It's hard, not being with him, anymore."

_(A year later, it was clear to anyone who was not blind, that Kurt was sick. His skin was paler, his eyes were duller. He lost appetite. Sebastian knew something was terribly wrong.)_

"Sometimes, I'm so mad at the world for doing this to me. To him. To us."

_(When he heard that dreaded word, he tensed so hard that he was vibrating in an effort to remain still. Beside him, Kurt simply looked sad. He knew this was coming, after all.)_

"…"

_("Your husband has blood cancer. Leukemia," the doctor added, as if Sebastian did not already know. "It's already in the terminal stage.")_

"…Kurt…"

_(Everything was a blur after that. Sophie spent most of her time in the hospital after school, by Sebastian's side, as they both watched Kurt lie in the hospital bed, wasting away by the minute.)_

"…I'm so sorry…"

_(Sebastian knew leukemia had a cure if Kurt had a matching donor. The trouble was…he did not.)_

"…"

_(Kurt always smiled, though. The curve of his lips were always there on his face even through the midst of the pain. They brightened when people came to visit. Kurt smiled so wide when Blaine came to visit, even having the time to take note of Blaine's puffy red eyes even though he himself was getting skinnier day by day.)_

"Why…aren't you here anymore, Kurt?"

_(There was one night that Kurt was temporarily discharged from the hospital. Sebastian remembered the way they made love that night, desperation and want and promises clear in every kiss and touch. Sebastian remembered holding him that night, tears stinging his eyes.) _

"It seemed so fast. Too damn fast, Kurt."

_(It was 11.56 p.m. on December 31__st__ . Kurt was half-asleep and Sebastian was holding his hand. Kurt smiled at him, weak and fragile. "Just…four more minutes…huh?" he croaked out.)_

"Kurt, aren't you the stronger one out of all of us?"

_("Yeah…" Sebastian replied. Kurt reached out to stroke Sebastian's cheek, his skin getting cold. Something in Sebastian's heart grew cold.)_

"Aren't you the one of those that fought the hardest amongst everybody in this damn planet?"

_("I'm so glad I ever met you, Sebastian. So…" Kurt smiled. "Glad to have known you.")_

"You're always telling that some things are worth fighting for."

_("I…love you. I love Sophie. Both of you…so very much.")_

"I've been fighting for you for so long."

_(Sophie stirred from her sleep. She looked at Kurt with some sort of wonder in her expression. "Daddy…" she said. "There's an angel beside you.")_

"I really did."

_("Kurt..I…I love you, too," Sebastian choked out. "So very much. God, Kurt, please…please don't-," But Kurt simply smiled one last time, closing his eyes. His hand in Sebastian's grasp went limp.)_

"Kurt, I just wanted to say…"

_(It was midnight. Outside, the fireworks went off, casting beautiful colors across the sky. Kurt's breathing had finally stopped.)_

"I.."

_("Kurt…I…")_

"I love you, so very much."

_("I won't ever forget you.")_

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**A/N: Really shouldn't be writing too much angst so early in the morning. **

**Reviews are lovely and appreciated. **


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